


her greatness is a musical

by cloudruniere



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, Mulan AU, Swearing, its not really romantic, its really cracky, kinda flirtatious if anything, so hopefully one person laughs, the word sex is said once
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2018-06-03
Packaged: 2019-05-17 18:01:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14836500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloudruniere/pseuds/cloudruniere
Summary: renjun meets the guardian of a rock





	her greatness is a musical

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this one after my markhyuck angsty deATH fic because i made myself sad

Why does there seem to be so many singing people, Renjun wonders as he rides through the crowd on his horse. The army had decided a few minutes before to do some type of synchronized dance about strength. He also heard some lines about making men and deduced that there was sex involved somewhere and thought that maybe a horse ride should suffice in avoiding whatever that was about.

Maybe it was the hype of the successful training camp happening next door or the general's son being in charge but honestly, if he could be blunt, Renjun was getting tired of women gossiping, spilling all these rumors about the men there, and spreading all their nasty thoughts. Well actually maybe the last one was okay- if the guy's were so passionate about making men, the woman in town would gladly help without question.

Not Renjun though. The dark haired boy was on his own and just struggled to thrive in a time where all anyone seemed to do was the basics and stereotypes set by their ancestors. Bullshit to those ancestors, Renjun thinks, they left me nothing.

Good day started good and ended badly with more singing echoing past the hills of the camp and seeping into the busy bustling of the tiny town beside it. Just fricking shut up, Renjun glares as he and his trusty steed (more bullshit because the amount of times the bitch has attempted to run away he swears to his ancestors-) hike up to the forest no one ever frequents. Why? Maybe because there's a whole lot of stuff that happened in there. Renjun reminisces about that one time a dragon scared that horse...or was it the horse scared the dragon...

Darkness loomed over the trees, masking the road Renjun trekked through, making it difficult to see and he wonders when it became night so fast. Something smells like it's burning and he sniffs the air, noticing hints of plastic and wood mixing with a weird scent reminding him of the products the woman in town used. He stops and hops off his horse (not bothering to tie it on a tree because he knows the horse can't find it's own way back and that's the only reason it'll stay), circling the immediate area, wondering what on Earth was polluting the air.

Maybe I'm just hungry, Renjun thinks, turning around but a sudden blast cuts through the crickets constant noise.

"HALT! WHO GOES THERE?!" It yells. Renjun slowly revolves to face a stone wall, which was just covered by shadows before, now illuminated by a light and outlining a figure. The effect makes it seem tall and mighty but Renjun guesses it's anything but.

"Hi," Renjun lazily waves his hand. "How you doing?"

"I'm pretty good, little tired- I MEAN-" a throat clears and this makes Renjun crack a smile. "WHO DARES TRESPASS THE HOLY ROCK OF FA MULAN'S TREASURED ANCESTORS?"

"Holy Rock?" Renjun asks, stepping closer.

"NO DON'T COME NEARER!" It yells.

"Why not?"

"IT IS NOT DECENT!"

"A treasured rock isn't decent?" Renjun laughs. "Next thing you'll tell me is that I have a nice horse."

Said animal neighs in complaint but that just goes over the boy's head.

"WHAT WAS THAT?"

"My horse."

"PRESENT FORTH THOU STEED."

"It's too far away, can't you just come out?" Renjun says, lying because he's staring at the dumb thing in the eye. But it was too hard to pass up a chance at getting Mr. High And Mighty out from his rock.

"GUARDIANS DO NOT RESPOND TO LAZINESS OF THE PEASANTS. YOU SHOULD BE BOWING DOWN BEFORE THE ROCK."

"I thought it wasn't decent?"

A growl of frustration reverberates. "FINE. BUT BACK AWAY. I MAY BE OVERWHELMING," It warns.

Renjun hardly believes it to be so and his assumptions are correct when the flame burning to illuminate the figure starts to dwindle until a figure comes out from behind the large structure. A boy steps out.

"Lee Jeno. Bask in my presence. I know. I know. Amazing right? Don't faint like the last guy," The guy's attractive, Renjun admits though a little cocky and too talkative from what he's already (regretfully) experienced. And even then there was that indecent rock separating them.

"Wow," Renjun says, his voice is dry, lacking emotion. "I am blown away." He whistles and turns around when the show isn't as interesting as he thought.

"WHOA WHOA! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?" Jeno yells, running around to cut in between Renjun and his horse.

"Um," Renjun says, cocking his eyebrow questioningly at the guy looking frenzied."...home?"

"PEOPLE MUST BE PUNISHED FOR STEPPING INTO THIS TERRITORY. DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT SURPASSED IN THIS LAND? THIS BLESSED GROUND?"

Renjun rubs his head, "Do you know what is going to surpass on this land if you don't lower your goddamn voice?"

Jeno jumps around, circling the other and making both of them dizzy. "Days ago the Great Stone Dragon had awoken to protect the daughter of the Fa family from harm as she entered the army."

"Isn't that illegal? Won't she lose her head? Or maybe she already lost it I don't know, we're not friends."

"Sir, please," Jeno held up his hand. "Save your questions for later."

Renjun's getting tired. "That wasn't a real question and good luck to her but I'm getting hungry-"

"She is destined to save China, all of Asia from the Huns. It is my duty as the Guardian of the Guardian to make sure that his job is fulfilled and spread the story of the greatness that will surely unfold in the future."

"Good to know her Greatness is being in a musical," Renjun motions to his horse but gets cut off again.

"The punishment."

"Oh, kill me now."

"I'm a pacifist," Jeno explains. "Though I could take you back to the Fa house, I think there's this one farmer guy who has anger issues to deal with."

"Okay," Renjun says, having had enough. "What can I do to get you off my back?"

Jeno taps his chin and sits himself down, cross-legged on the muddy road. Renjun doesn't think it looks very comfortable but the guy seems to be thinking pretty hard and doesn't notice the rain from yesterday starting to seep through the fabric of his pants.

"Um, you may not want to-"

"I GOT IT."

Renjun leans on his horse, ignoring the loathe filled look sent to him from the animal, "Can't wait to hear this."

"BE MY SLAVE."

"Gods no."

"Aw darn," Jeno pouts, shoulders slumping in disappointment.

Renjun actually feels bad for the guy with an unnoticed wet bottom and seeing as how he pretty much lived in a forest with a rock, he decides to entertain him. "Fine, consider this-"

Jeno perks up and listens.

"If the troops lose against the Huns then I'm going back to town without ever returning - "

The other noticeably deflates and seems anxious if this were to be the result.

"But, if they win, then I'll be your slave."

He honestly doesn't think it'd be as bad as working as a seamstress with those to-be-married-let's-sing-every-time-we-need-to-bring-honor customers every week.

You all know how that war ended.

 

-

 

"WHO DARES DISTURB THE MAGNIFICENT, THE WONDERFUL, THE INDESTRUCTIBLE-"

"Jeno, it's me."

A pause in the obnoxious, earsplitting intro.

"THE PLEASURABLE-"

"YOU ASS. YOU MAKE ME CLEAN YOUR UNDERWEAR IN THE RIVER AGAIN, I'M GOING TO MAKE SURE YOU DON'T NEED THEM ANYMORE."

**Author's Note:**

> my twitter @babyIeIe if you want to witness me proclaim my love for zhong chenle every 2 seconds


End file.
